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A Letter to the Newly Diagnosed (April 8, 2011)

Dear Talaya,

I know that you are confused and distraught about the news that you received today. You did not do anything wrong to get cancer. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Be kind and patient with yourself. Take this time to focus on you and regaining your health. I do want to warn you that some people will not know what to say or do. Some people will not show up for you or even acknowledge that you have cancer. Focus on the people who do show up and give their all to support you and make sure you have what you need. Some people will doubt your level of sickness simply based on what they see on the outside. Try not to take it personally. Know that you are worthy of love and support. Know that God has your back even when you feel alone. There will be good days and bad days. Ride those waves because that is where you will grow. You will become mentally, emotionally, and spiritually stronger. Your physical strength and immune system will depend on it. It is ok to be sad, mad, depressed, etc., but please try not to stay there too long. You still have your life ahead of you. Remember that is what the journey is for. To get to your best life, a life that you will live on your terms and a good quality of life.

Talaya, it is hard to believe it now, but your life will be totally different after this experience and for the better! You will learn to live with cancer by speaking up and advocating for yourself, asking for what you truly want and need, learning as much as you can so that you can understand your options and make the best decisions for yourself, and most importantly how to balance the physical, medical, and emotional sides of cancer. You will learn to put yourself first and not feel guilty about it. You will find your voice! You will view life through a new lens and nothing that you go through will be in vain. I believe that you will use this experience to help others and make sure that they are not alone.

Cancer will be one of the toughest things that you will face in life. However, it will prepare you for other challenges and times of uncertainty. You can do this! I believe in you! I can’t wait to see you On the Other Side! 💖 💖

With Love,


The Cancer Doula

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